Matthew Leffler (kymatt19) wrote,
Matthew Leffler

55:03 Josh Dugan Anson Klabber

Ignore the video ... it kinda is stupid and I hate when people make video's to music using some stupid scenes from a TV show.  Oh version of the music I can find.

Josh Dugan and Anson Klabber are both official boyfriends but each lasted only a month and in each case I returned to the longer BF I dated before them ... after that month.  Both great guys, but still not the time to build memories.  In fact, Tony Bennett was mine and Anson's song (at least in my head) and Josh and I never got to focus on one.

Josh Dugan came during Kevin Baker troubles.  He and I were president's of our schools gay clubs.  Him EKU ... me WKU.  Funny side note when Matthew Shepard was killed Josh had thought it was me.  We were both Leo's and both driven and to that end neither of us was ready to be out of our own spot lights.  

Anson Klabber was during Brandon Hampton's time.  I cheated on Anson with Brandon one night ... and afterwards Brandon emailed Anson to tell him about it.  Anson responded to us both with this "If Matthew didn't cheat on me then I want you to know I like him and I want to be with him.  If Matthew did cheat on me then I want you to know I like him and I want to be with him."   Very sweet ... it brought me to the decision that ended us.  I drove to Lexington to see him and with in the first hour of being there I explained we should breakup.  I wasn't worthy and I'd do him harm.  He told me he appreciated that I drove all the way to tell him that and we ended on good terms.  His readiness to forgive me was enough to show me I wasn't ready for what he had to offer.

Each moved on into their own lives and I probably became a minor chapter in their lives but they still taught me about myself and about being committed to another person.

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