June 15th, 2006

Matt Leffler

INDEPENDENCE DECLARED



SO anyhow...as indicated in my most recent entry Brent Jones is on the outs.  I really dont give a flying fuck right now what he thinks or says.  I think there comes a time when you say...enough is enough.  Sure I had these dreams of this and that dancing in my head but lets be honest....its never gonna happen.  The guy cant even handle a relationship from Chile!!!!   I mean....he is cute....but there are like 10 guys that are cute that I could take to the movies tonight.  So why am I holding myself back for a boy?  

Why this change of direction?  Cause as romantic as the Titanic's maiden voyage may have been....shit happens and it turns into a tragedy.  Brent cant respond to me unless I put in his myspace inbox a subject that says....I am soo pissed at you...while he is online.  Otherwise I wouldnt get a response unless I ignored him like last time.  end result.....I have to make it so that he can't rely on me to be stuck on him.  That begins with....

Programming your email server to automatically respond to him with the message that his email is being deleted and to fuck off cause Matt will never be informed of his attempt to contact him.  Then you block him on Yahoo.  Then you ditch him on myspace all together and that should...effectively put us back into the same communication mode that he wanted....just now it is equal.  SO.....

Fuck off.  :-)  

Word to the wise...if you happen upon this message and are dating me now...( sometime in the future from this posting )....keep in mind something that I have said here before...and I will reaffirm...   IF YOU GET SO COMFORTABLE WITH HOW MUCH I SHOW YOU THAT I CARE....SO COMFORTABLE THAT YOU AREN'T SHOWING ME THE COURTESY OF ACKNOWLEDGING I EXIST....YOU'LL BE ON THE SCRAP PILE OF EXES, NO MATTER HOW CUTE YOU WERE.  Cause if I allow someone to treat me poorly...why would anyone else expect anything more?

I am off now...I have no secrets and my next relationship will have no secrets. 

Matt Leffler

(no subject)

So lets end the day's journal on a more upbeat note.  I went out with friends for dinner...emailed a guy I have been debating emailing...and am getting ready to head on out to Q for water gun night in a flash here.  I'll try to take some pictures...i know its been a spell.  Brent and I are not talking and thats really the best most likely for us both.  He still wants his time and space...and I have had plenty of time and space to realize that what is worth your time....is someone else.  No bad feelings, just equal space now...no one is passing up chances.  So the search begins.  I'll keep you updated and well try to get some pics in here.